Looking for relationship dependant parenting advice?

My girlfriend and I live together. She came into the relationship with her son who is about to be 1 year old. We get into huge disagreements of discipline for him. I believe when the kid does something he shouldn't that you can tell him no in a stern voice she thinks otherwise. Is this wrong? When I say things he shouldn't I mean hitting in the face, biting, scratching anywhere especially the face. She got really upset because one morning I was half asleep and he hit me in the eye and it caught me off guard and in a stern maybe to stern voice I told him NO. He began to cry, she was mad. For one, I was caught off guard but no excuses for it, I did it. Are these things wrong for a 1 year old little boy? Please help! I want nothing more than to be with this girl for the rest of my life and help her raise her son but we are about to split because of some of these issues. All advice is appreciated. Thank you!Looking for relationship dependant parenting advice?
My now husband came into my sons life when he turned 2. it was a hard transition for us to move in together and have him discipline my son. We argued for a very long time about parenting styles, but finally came to a common ground after living together for a while. I think that you do need to have a role in being a disciplinary in her childs life, but to a certain extent. Remember, you are not the childs father, and for her she probably wants the best for her son, so you yelling and screaming at him probably doesn't go over with her well. I would sit down with her and say look, if i am going to help raise him and be in his life like he is my own, we need to come up with a combined way of parenting that we both agree on. Find out whats ok and whats not and try to respect her wishes. It's tough, I know it first hand, but in the end things will work out.Looking for relationship dependant parenting advice?
It seems she doesn't want you disciplining her child... If that doesn't jive well with you, you need to leave, cause it will NOT get better... Imagine when he's a terrible two, a horrible three, a teenager with testosterone!! Your girlfriend may love you, but she's also protective of her baby, as she should be... She knows you're not the father, and it may be making her defensive.





I'd find someone who doesn't have a kid.
I don't think your wrong for telling him no if he's done/is doing something he shouldn't be. Maybe you should try telling her when he's done something wrong and let her deal with it if she doesn't want you to discipline him. Is his father in the picture? or will you be the ';dad'; to him?... Maybe that would change things a little. If his dad is in the picture, I don't know if I would like the fact that your disciplining him either... he has me and his father for that... but if your going to be dad... then she has to give a little.





Good luck!
Communication can make or break ANY relationship. Talk to her about how she wants things dealt with and find common ground. If you can't come together on your own, and you are serious about staying with her, suggest family counseling. Good luck to you sir.
Children need discipline. I see nothing wrong with what you did. I also see nothing wrong with spanking children when the misbehave.
There's nothing wrong with telling a one year old no. How else is he going to learn right from wrong? The problem is that just saying no is not always effective. You need to teach the child what he CAN do. For example, when he hits let him know he hurt you, but then show him something that is acceptable to do with his hands - ';Hands are for patting. See? Daddy is patting your cheeks.'; Then praise him when he pats your cheeks gently. The problem is going to be your girlfriend. If she continues allowing her son to go undisciplined, she will be raising a monster. If she really wants you to be a dad to her kid, she is going to have to allow you to act like one. If she won't, you should get out while you can, because she will make your life a living hell.
With my daughter I use ';No'; say ';Mommy owwie'; and then redirect her to a petting motion while saying ';nice';. - I actually had to do that more so with the dogs and now at 11 months she pats them. (no longer trying to pull their hair)





Btw this doesn't just work overnight. It has to be consistent.





You also should be sure to give positive reinforcement - when he immediately stops the ';bad'; behavior, cheer him on %26amp; use caring/soothing words. (Yay Billy. Good boy billy!)





Also understand that he is a baby so they don't understand what they are doing is wrong. Both yourself and your girlfriend should consider couples counseling to help you both get on to the same page.





She might possibly be more concerned with you replacing her position in her sons life than you letting her son know that what he is doing hurts you.