Trouble with my relationship - please serious advice?

I have been with my fiance for 3 yrs now. We live together %26amp; have a gorgeous little 5 month old boy that makes my life worth living. It's amazing how fast he turns a bad day into a good one with a little smile :) I love my fiance very much %26amp; have always had a rocky relationship. I found out he was cheating on me 2 yrs into the relationship %26amp; I made the mistake to revenge cheat on him as well. We both decided to work on it but still have many problems. He doesn't trust me although I've managed to trust him. He has a very bad attitude %26amp; gets upset very quickly. When he gets upset he calls me names (cusses %26amp; threatens to slap me- although he never has hit me). He doesn't trust me at work %26amp; when I step out for lunch it turns into a big argument because he says that I was out cheating on him with someone from work. Which is entirely false! I only have lunch with 2 girlfriends of mine. We are not affectionate with each other at all. Don't know what to do anymore... I'm very frustrated. There's no respect between us..Trouble with my relationship - please serious advice?
if he seems to threaten you physically and hurt you emotionally/verbally then your not gonna gain anything from this relationship . you're feelings seem to lower and lower each day since he makes you mad or upsets you in different ways . i know its kind of weird that i am 16 and im answering your question but i witness this everyday with my mom and stepdad . its not worth it . you can find someone so much better that treats you right . you're fiance sounds like he's crazy and needs some therapy or a little help so i would try and break it of because its not worth your pain . in a relationship you need trust, respect, and love . if you dont have that then you two will never get anywhere .Trouble with my relationship - please serious advice?
Leave the guy, he is not a very nice person to be around. It could end up in death. And do you really want your child to grow up in that environment. It will teach your son it is ok to treat women with no respect. I would leave.
have you seen fireproof(the marriage fixer movie), there's also a book that goes with it, called the love dare..


let your boyfriend watch the movie(if you can),


and you read the book, and get him to do it to.


after my boyfriend watched that movie, he's become so much more reliable, helpful, more respectful towards me and others, he's become a better man because of it. try it out, hope it helps!
Hopefully you are reading some of these answers and taking good advice. If your relationship has gotten so bad that he is cussing and threatening to hit you, do you think a marriage with this man will work out any better? You could try counseling, but I think you should prepare to get a child support order and get away from him before he really does start hitting you. He does not LOVE you.
sorry to say, once you reach that point, its over, move on.the trust is gone, and most likely forever, it would be like beating a dead horse,
first let sget this out, theres no such thing as revenge cheating.YOU JUST WANTED to cheat anyway. it looks like you two have run your course.GO ahead and split and set up visitatation and child support ,and go on with your lives.
This may seem like odd advice...and I'm sure most people will tell you to dump him, but leaving your child without a father should be the last resort and not the first one.





You have to compartmentalize his cheating and yours. You have to deal with you being cheated on. Decide if you TRULY forgive him...and if you do...let it go.





Second of all, you have to recognize that your cheating on your boyfriend was YOUR FAULT...not his. You are a woman and presumably a lady, so no matter how ignorant he acts there is a manner in which you should carry yourself at all times. What you did was wrong because it was done deliberately to hurt him. While he was thinking with his pants...YOU WERE THINKING when you did what you did. He has a right to be angry. While I don't agree that he should be yelling at you and threatening you, you however should atone for what you did and do what is necessary to earn his trust back.





I'll give you an example. While I never cheated on my girlfriend, before we made it official I was seeing other women. I was staying at her house and would drive the 85 miles to my house for over nights or weekends with other women. She eventually found out and the fact that we weren't official was the only thing that allowed her to forgive me; however it hurt her no less. In order to make up for that I hardly ever went back to my house unless it was absolutely necessary. And when I did, I would call or email her regularly just so that she would know that I wasn't with someone.





You might modify your actions by letting your boyfriend know in advance where you're going and contact him while you're there (let him hear some background noise) just so that he will feel comfortable. After a while, he will regain trust in you.





Now, I'm sure that my response is going to be the opposite of what everyone else is going to tell you. People are going to tell you to dump him because he cheated. You already forgave him so it's an old issue. They're going to tell you to dump him because he yells and threatens to slap you. Yelling isn't illegal and it is also a show of emotions which may be difficult for him. Threatening to slap you is not the same as slapping you. I threaten to shoot my kids, but as of yet there are no bullet holes in them.





Someone once told me that you can never dump someone unless you are the best man(woman) you can be because you never know if their behavior is due to your poor behavior.





Good luck...remember you have a child involved.
Let me ask you, what exactly is it that you love about this relationship? Sounds to me like the two of you have more problems than you do advantages. Just because you have a child together doesn't mean that you have to continue living your life like this. No one deserves that. If the two you you can't clean this up with counseling, I really think you need to leave and get in a healthy relationship if not for your sake then for the sake of your child. You really think this is a good environment to raise a child in?


Red
There's too much to go into here. Both of you blew it - as you know.





BUT - this can be fixed. Go to www.marriagerepaircenter.com. Read the website. There's a LOT of help offered right on their site. They have free phone and email consulting too.
Where you made your biggest mistake, was cheating on him! That is never the answer, and you put yourself in this situation when you did.





Unfortunately its different for men when woman cheat, vs the other way around. His ego has been damaged. Yes he cheated on you, and that was bad enough, but when you call yourself getting back at him for cheating, you put yourself in the hot seat, and he actually became the victim in the relationship.





Infidelity is a very serious thing in a relationship. Trust is the key factor here, and you both screwed up. He has no right to treat you like crap, however, you have no right to demand much from him, because of your dishonesty.





You may want to seek counseling, and if it helps thats a good thing, otherwise,





It may just be over for the both of you, and that's sad, because you have a young child to raise, but it may just be time to move on, and if so, Do Not, use your child as a weapon against him. Let him continue to be apart of your childs life.
move on cause living like this isn't really living happy
The only thing you have to decide is this:





Do you really want to spend the rest of your life like this?
You don't have to be hit to be abused. He is verbally and emotionally abusive, you need to leave this relationship.
it's time for a change honey. you don't need to be accused of something you didn't do. if it were me and i got accused of doing things all the time, i guess i would do it. i'm already catching the hell. take your little pride and joy and try to start a new life. you will find someone who you can trust, and who can trust you. someone who will put as big of smile on your face as your child does. life is short, so be happy , find someone you can trust.
Time to move on.