Abusive relationship after effects +10pts best advice.?

good evening, This has been occupying my mind for a while. I was in an abusive relationship for a year, I loved him, wanted to help him, but he hurt me. So much, that my parents had to intervene and make me get a restraining order.





This relationship wreaked havoc on my self esteem. After 2 years of being single, I am seeing another person and I have trouble expressing , communicating my feelings to him. It's irrational, but I am afraid I will get hurt again- once I ';confess my love.';


Q: What should I do to ease my insecurities? (Should I mention my past relationship to him?) How do I tell him I really care about him?





[Once feelings are out on the table, I am known to just disappear, grow distant, fight over something stupid, etc.] - I don't want this to happen again.





P.S.: I think he also has trouble expressing his feelings because he is leaving for med school in a couple months. :(Abusive relationship after effects +10pts best advice.?
What you need to do is realize what your ex did to you was wrong, and you didn't deserve any of that, and you need to stop being a victim. Get out of that cycle because now it will only bring you down. You need to sit down with your new guy and put it all out on the table and tell him what you've been through. He will understand, most importantly though if you don't make yourself a victim, and you stay completely strong. This experience has drastically shaped your life, but now it's your time to turn it around and make something positive out of it. Try speaking with abuse victims, or volunteering at abuse shelters. It will make you feel so good and be able to become closer to your new guy.Abusive relationship after effects +10pts best advice.?
You should probably tell him abut your past. If the relationship is meant to be, he will understand and won't let you run away from him. The only way to overcome what happened is to deal with it. Sometimes that means discussing what happened with others. Explain to him about your insecurities and how you think he could help you overcome them. A loving boyfriend would talk with you and help you.
This sounds like a casual dating relationship.


Because he is leaving soon for med school,


it sounds as if it needs to stay on a casual level.





Definitely do talk about what went wrong in your previous relationship. Speak of your insecurities. This is the type of


friendship you can greatly benefit from, hearing what a guy


would say about another guy's actions. This is an excellent


learning situation for you. Just a friendship though, leave


your feelings out of it.





AND...get yourself some therapy for abuse recovery. Part of


the therapy will be learning to build positive relationships %26amp;


learning to trust people who can be trusted.